Conversations About Heroes: A Journey With My Son
This week, I had a special conversation with my son, Andrew, about something close to both of our hearts: the Hero's Journey. What started as a chat about his fascination with stories quickly spiraled into a deep dive into something much bigger—something I couldn’t help but reflect on long after we stopped recording.Andrew’s understanding of the Hero’s Journey caught me off guard in the best way. He explained it with a clarity and thoughtfulness that felt beyond his years. The way he framed it as a life cycle—something we go through every day, week or over the course of years—was so simple, yet so profound.
He made a point that stuck with me: the Hero’s Journey isn’t just reserved for epic stories or larger-than-life characters like Harry Potter. It’s something we all experience, and we live multiple cycles of it—sometimes even within the same day. There’s the “Ordinary World” we all start in, the “Call to Adventure” that shakes things up, and that critical moment where we Cross the Threshold into The Unknown.
As a parent, hearing Andrew talk about how he sees his own journey made me pause and reflect on my role in his. When am I his mentor, like Dumbledore to Harry? When does it make sense to serve as one of his Allies, walking alongside him as he faces his daily trials? And the most scary thought of all...I wonder if I'm ever...the Monster? Either way it was a good reminder that my job isn’t to be the Hero in his story...but a secondary character, equipping him with the tools and confidence to move forward along whatever path his journey takes him.
One of the most powerful moments in our conversation was when we talked about Monsters. For Andrew, Monsters aren't just mythical creatures or villains in stories. They’re real things—Resistance, Distraction, Victimhood, Anxiety—that hold us back from reaching our full potential. It made me think about the "Monsters" I’ve faced in my life and how they’ve shaped me, and it also made me wonder about the ones he’ll face as he continues to grow.
What I found fascinating was Andrew’s perspective on losing to those monsters. To him, the real loss isn’t in failing to defeat the Monster; it’s in giving up. He reminded me of something that is so easy to forget - even when you lose, you’re still learning. That insight, coming from a nine-year-old, felt like a warm hug for my soul. Here is my son, already understanding that it’s not about winning or losing—it’s about continuing the Journey.
I’ve been thinking a lot about those final two steps he mentioned: Returning Home, Having Changed. We talk so much in our family about the importance of growth, but Andrew’s take on it was striking. He framed change not as something flashy or obvious but as a kind of quiet transformation. Like the caterpillar that turns to mush inside a cocoon before becoming a butterfly, real change often happens invisibly, in the midst of what feels like chaos or even destruction. It’s not always easy to see or appreciate in the moment, but that change is essential.
As parents, we're constantly on our own Hero’s Journey. There are daily challenges—Resistance, Distraction, Anxiety and yes, even Victimhood. Sometimes I deny The Call because I’m tired or overwhelmed. But listening to Andrew, I was reminded that every day is a new opportunity to answer The Call. And like he said, you can always choose your next action to be Heroic.
Andrew closed our conversation with a Challenge: to reflect on our own Hero’s Journey and think about a full cycle we’ve gone through in our lives. It’s a challenge I’ve been thinking about a lot since then. How often do I stop and really consider the story I’m living, the cycles I’m completing, and the changes happening within me?
The conversation was a simple one, but like all good Hero’s Journeys, it left me changed—grateful for the insight of a young mind and for the journey we’re all on together.
Andrew closed our conversation with a Challenge: to reflect on our own Hero’s Journey and think about a full cycle we’ve gone through in our lives. It’s a challenge I’ve been thinking about a lot since then. How often do I stop and really consider the story I’m living, the cycles I’m completing, and the changes happening within me?
The conversation was a simple one, but like all good Hero’s Journeys, it left me changed—grateful for the insight of a young mind and for the journey we’re all on together.
Andrew's Challenge:
Take a moment to reflect on your own Hero’s Journey. Where are you in the cycle? Are you answering the call to adventure, facing trials, or maybe even returning home changed? And, most importantly, how will you approach your next Challenge?
RESOURCE LINKS
- What Makes a Hero? - TED Ed video - Matthew Winkler
- Check out the fun Hero's Journey Merch at www.SecretHeroProject.com
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