Feedback is one of those things we all know is important, but it rarely feels easy. Whether you're trying to encourage growth, guide someone toward their potential, or simply acknowledge the effort someone has put in, feedback can feel like walking a tightrope. Say too little, and your words risk being vague or unhelpful. Say too much, and suddenly it feels like a critique of the person rather than what they’ve done. It’s a balancing act that leaves plenty of us hesitating on the sidelines.
Recently, the team and I reflected on how feedback works in our learning studios, and I keep coming back to this question: What makes feedback both effective and easy to hear? Not just for learners, but for all of us. Feedback can open a door to growth, but is most powerful when it’s delivered—and received—in a way that builds trust and clarity.
Quantitative feedback might tell you, “Your performance scored an 8 out of 10.” Qualitative feedback says, “Your presentation was engaging because you used storytelling effectively, but you lost the audience a bit when you went into the technical details.” See the difference? One’s just data; the other is a story
Recently, the team and I reflected on how feedback works in our learning studios, and I keep coming back to this question: What makes feedback both effective and easy to hear? Not just for learners, but for all of us. Feedback can open a door to growth, but is most powerful when it’s delivered—and received—in a way that builds trust and clarity.
Qualitative Feedback: What’s the Big Deal?
Before diving into key components and techniques, let’s clarify what we mean by qualitative feedback. Unlike quantitative feedback—those neat little numbers and scores—qualitative feedback is about the how and the why. Often, it can be most powerful when it focuses on things you can’t easily measure or when adding additional context in a narrative form around quantitative data.Quantitative feedback might tell you, “Your performance scored an 8 out of 10.” Qualitative feedback says, “Your presentation was engaging because you used storytelling effectively, but you lost the audience a bit when you went into the technical details.” See the difference? One’s just data; the other is a story
Why It’s So Hard
Here’s the rub: qualitative feedback can feel personal. As with many things in life, it’s greatest superpower also presents it’s greatest risk. Whether you’re giving it or receiving it, there’s this little voice that whispers, “They’re judging me.” As a giver, you might worry about hurting feelings or burning through social capital. As a receiver, it’s easy to misinterpret well-meaning feedback as a critique of who you are, not what you did. And don’t even get me started on the fear of “fluffy” feedback—stuff that sounds nice but is about as useful as a fortune cookie proverb…and somewhat ironically can actually breed distrust (“They’re lying - they know it wasn’t great.”) and destroy credibility (“Well they clearly don’t know what they are talking about and aren’t bringing anything to the table.”).Three Key Ingredients: Warm, Cool, and Challenge
In our Studios, we use three "ingredients" of feedback: Warm, Cool, and Challenge. These categories offer a simple way to think about how feedback works and how to make it meaningful.Warm Feedback: Noticing the Good Stuff
Warm feedback is about recognizing and affirming the productive actions, choices, or processes someone has demonstrated. It’s not about offering vague compliments like, “You’re amazing!” Instead, warm feedback focuses on what someone did or chose that demonstrated effort, excellence, or character.For example:
- “It was great to see you push through the tricky parts of this task—you didn’t give up, even when it got tough…”
- “I loved how you used many different colors in an interesting and unique way..”
- “I noticed how you stayed calm and helped everyone focus when the project started going sideways...”
Cool Feedback: Identifying Growth Areas
Cool feedback is where we step into the sometimes-uncomfortable territory of identifying things that could be better. It’s not criticism for the sake of pointing out flaws. Instead, it’s about finding areas of improvement that are relevant to the other person’s goals.For example:
- “Your idea was great, but it got a little lost in all the details. Simplifying your main point could make it even stronger next time.”
- “I think you might’ve relied on others to step in during this part. Maybe next time, you could take the lead more confidently.”
- “You might consider rewriting this final paragraph to make it easier for your reader to understand how your arguments fit together in your overall idea…”
Challenge: The Call to Adventure
This one’s my favorite. Challenge feedback is all about the future. It’s where we help someone see the next step they can take to move closer to their goals. It’s not about prescribing what they must do, but about opening doors and framing possibilities.For example:
- “Next time, I’d love to see you experiment with breaking your project into smaller chunks to keep the team focused.”
- “I challenge you to try leading the next discussion. I think you’ll find it pushes you in some exciting ways.”
- “I dare you to brainstorm 5 new ways to…”
There’s something inherently empowering about a challenge—it’s like a Call to Adventure. A good challenge invites the other person to take action and gives them a clear path forward. The best challenges are both inspiring and actionable, offering a clear (and potentially exciting) path to growth and adventure without feeling like an obligation.
In the right balance, these types of feedback create a powerful cycle of recognition, reflection, and growth. But it’s not just about what we say. It’s about how we say it—with clarity, respect, and an understanding of the other person’s goals. Feedback isn’t about imposing our vision of success—it’s about helping someone see their own path more clearly.
And when you give feedback, experiment with these three ingredients. Notice how people respond. Do they lean into the conversation? Do they feel inspired to act? Feedback isn’t just about improving performance; it’s about building trust and connection. And who doesn’t want a little more of that in their lives?
Why It’s Worth the Effort
What’s fascinating is how these types of feedback interact with each other. Warm feedback builds trust and affirms what’s working. Cool feedback shines a light on growth areas, helping someone see opportunities they might’ve missed. And a well-framed Challenge opens the door to what’s next—a nudge toward becoming a little better, a little braver.In the right balance, these types of feedback create a powerful cycle of recognition, reflection, and growth. But it’s not just about what we say. It’s about how we say it—with clarity, respect, and an understanding of the other person’s goals. Feedback isn’t about imposing our vision of success—it’s about helping someone see their own path more clearly.
Challenge Accepted?
Here’s your Call to Adventure: Start a conversation with someone you regularly give feedback to—whether it’s a young hero, a coworker, or your partner. Ask them what kind of feedback they find most helpful. Do they prefer Warm, Cool, or Challenges? Their answer might surprise you.And when you give feedback, experiment with these three ingredients. Notice how people respond. Do they lean into the conversation? Do they feel inspired to act? Feedback isn’t just about improving performance; it’s about building trust and connection. And who doesn’t want a little more of that in their lives?
Related to this Episode
- Episode 110 - The Role of Feedback in a Learner-Driven Environment
- #HeroToolshed Collection - Take a peek at some of the key tools our Heroes use everyday to level up their skills and mindset.
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About the Author
Angela is passionate about reshaping the way kids learn and grow. As the co-founder of Acton Academy Northwest Austin, Angela is dedicated to fostering a learner-driven environment where curiosity thrives and students take ownership of their educational journeys. When not working with young heroes, they’re often exploring big ideas on education, parenting, and lifelong learning right here on the blog.Want to learn more about our innovative approach to education? Check out Acton Academy Northwest Austin to see how we’re redefining school for the next generation of curious thinkers and independent learners.